Case 36: Waswasa’s and Insecurity

﷽‎

ولحَمْدُ الله رب العلمين

‎و الصلاة و السلام على محمد و على آله و اصحابه اجمعين وبعد

السلام عليكم ورحمة الله وبركاته

❓Question❓

Today’s case is regarding a sister who is not able to rid herself of her negative thoughts, and she is constantly having waswasa’s about her husband’s ex-girlfriend, and she is very insecure about her relationship. Although she is a practicing muslimah, she finds it very difficult to overcome these waswasas and thinks she is not strong enough to beat shaitaan.

🅰️Answer📝

Dear sister, you understand in your knowledge that these are nothing but waswasas from shaitaan. I have already done a post on OCD, and what you are experiencing is also a form of OCD. The constant thoughts of your husband’s ex and consequent negative thoughts related to this is a means through which shaitaan is trying to break you from inside and making it appear to you that you are weak.

Allah‎ﷻ has given us the power to beat shaitaan or else why would He give us the concept of free will? If we think we are weak, we will always remain weak, our thoughts and the language we use in communicating with ourselves plays a very important role in our self-concept, always use gentle words and language in dealing with yourself.

As always the important point to remember is that this is your test. This is how Allah‎ﷻ has chosen to test you, and you are strong as it is, and this test will only make you stronger. How can we think that we can’t beat shaitaan when he is merely a feeble creation of Allah‎ﷻ, just like us. He has no power over us, it is in us, if we are going to give him that power to control us.

As believers we are all faced with this trial, and if we give shaitaan that position of strength and power then where is the striving for the sake of Allah‎ﷻ and how can we attain Jannah. And what you need to tell yourself is there is no power or might except with Allah‎ﷻ. By giving shaitaan that authority over us, we would actually be committing shirk, استغفرالله! May Allah‎ﷻ protect us from that. أمين.

The next thing I want to tell you is, the fixation over your husband itself. As much as you may love your husband, and as much as you may be possessive about him, the ultimate love is that of Allah‎ﷻ, and we cannot love anyone more than we love Allah‎ﷻ, our obedience to our husbands should also be be solely for the sake of Allah‎ﷻ, and again we cannot give them the place that’s reserved for Allah‎ﷻ alone. We love them, we take care of them, are obedient to them, and we please them, only so that Allah‎ﷻ can be pleased with us. Period.

So, when you start seeing things from the perspective of pleasing Allah‎ﷻ first then automatically, your fixation will drop and you will have more tawakal ilallah, and your insecurities will start fading because you will now be secure in the comfort that your affairs are being taken care of by your maker. What more can one ask for when his affairs are in the hands of الوكيل (Al Wakeel- the disposer of affairs).

You also mentioned that you keep bring up the issue of his ex again and again in arguments with him, and you also said that he is not in touch with her, but you have a doubt that he may still have feelings for her. Well, I want to tell you here, is that, what you are doing is reminding him of something over and over again, when he has moved on. Why would you want to give him a reason to compare and create something which doesn’t exist by giving him these reminders. A wife should be a source of peace for her husband,

‘Abdullah ibn ‘Amr رضى الله عنه said, that the Messenger of Allah‎ﷺ‎ said: “This world is temporary joys, and the best temporary joy of this world is a righteous wife.”

Muslim and Ibn Maajah.

Be that kind of wife to your husband. By giving these constant reminders to your husband you are actually putting yourself in the very situation that you fear. I advice you to stop bringing up these sensitive and damaging issues and put your trust on Allah‎ﷻ and keep yourself engaged in useful activities.

To stop the waswasa’s, keep yourself in dhikr of Allah‎ﷻ and every time you sense the thought creeping in, seek refuge in Allah, say;

‎ أعوذ بالله من الشيطان الرجيم

and لا حَوْلَ وَلا قُوَّةَ إِلا بِالله

recite آية الكرسي, the four قل etc. These are the best and effective tools against fighting shaitaan, and the key here is to stop the negative thought right at its root, don’t dwell on these thoughts as they are like a leech and will start feeding on you if you let them creep in even if it’s just a crack.

It’s is not easy fighting the enemy, but with perseverance and sincere efforts combined with complete trust and reliance on Allah‎ﷻ, it’s absolutely possible.

I ask Allah‎ﷻ to make your struggles easy for you and to help you overcome your negative thinking and to grant you victory in your fight against shaitaan.

أمين يا رب العلمين

‎سُبحَانَ رَبِّكَ رَبِ العِزَّةِ عَمَّا يَصِفُون وَسَلَامٌ عَلى المُرسَلِين والحَمدُ الله رَبِ العلمين

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

Solace Islamic Assistance

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

Case 22: Evil Eye and Marital Issue

‎﷽‎

ولحَمْدُ الله رب العلمين

‎و الصلاة و السلام على محمد و على آله و اصحابه اجمعين وبعد

السلام عليكم ررحمة الله وبركاته

❓Question ❓

The sister who is married for the past one year says that her initial days of marriage were spent with arguments with her husband for irrelevant issues, and she thinks this maybe because of evil eye as she was taking selfies with her friend’s on her wedding day.

🅰️Answer📝

To answer this question I would first like to address what is evil eye.

The definition of evil eye

According to the scholars,

The Arabic word al-‘ayn (the evil eye) refers to when a person harms another with his eye. When a person likes a thing, that another has, then his evil feelings affect it, by means of his repeated looking at the object of his jealousy. Allah‎ﷻ commanded Prophet‎ﷺ‎ to seek refuge with Him from the envier, as He said:

“And from the evil of the envier when he envies.” [113:5]

The evil eye is like an arrow which comes from the soul of the one who envies and the one who puts the evil eye on another towards the one who is envied and on whom the evil eye is put; sometimes it hits him and sometimes it misses. If the target is exposed and unprotected, it will affect him, but if the target is cautious and armed, the arrow will have no effect and may even come back on the one who launched it. {Adapted from Zaad al-Ma’aad. [Source; IslamQA]}

In a Saheeh hadith, ‘Aishah وضى الله عنها said: “The Messenger of Allah‎ﷺ‎ used to tell me to recite ruqyah for protection against the evil eye.”

Also, narrated from Ibn ‘Abbas that the Prophet said: “The evil eye is real and if anything were to overtake the divine decree, it would be the evil eye. When you are asked to take a bath (to provide a cure) from the influence of the evil eye, you should take a bath.”

[Muslim]

The majority of scholars are of the view that people can indeed be afflicted by the evil eye, because of the ahadeeth pertaining to it and because of the corroborating reports and other evidence.

Some of the measures we can take in order to protect ourselves from Evil Eye:

1. We have to protect ourselves against the devils among the evil jinn and mankind, by having strong faith in Allah and by putting our tawakkul in Him and seeking refuge with Him and beseech Him, reciting the ‘Ad’iyah for protection narrated from the Prophet‎ﷺ‎, reciting al-Mu’awwadhatayn [Surah Falaq and Naad], Surat al-Ikhlas, Surat al-Fatihah, and Ayat al-Kursi.

2. Some of the ‘Ad’iyah for seeking protection from Evil eye are:

⚜A’oodhu bi kalimat-illah il-tammati min sharri ma khalaqa (I seek refuge in the perfect words of Allah from the evil of that which He has created).

⚜A’oodhu bi kalimat-illah il-tammati min ghadabihi wa ‘iqabihi, wa min sharri ‘ibadihi wa min hamazat al-shayateeni wa an yahduroon

(I seek refuge in the perfect words of Allah from His wrath and punishment, from the evil of His slaves and from the evil promptings of the devils and from their presence).

And one may recite the words of Allah‎ﷻ:

⚜“Hasbi Allahu la ilaha illa huwa, ‘alayhi tawakkaltu wa huwa Rabb ul-‘arsh il-‘azeem

(Allah is sufficient for me, in Him I put my trust and He is the Lord of the Mighty Throne).”

⚜La ilaha illa Huwa

(none has the right to be worshipped but He).

Some other things that we can do are:

1. Avoid sharing the details of our lives on social media or even sharing too much information with people whom we know do not wish well for us.

2. Living a simple and humble life. Avoiding boasting and bragging about our accomplishments.

3. Avoiding attention seeking behavior. In this sisters case, taking selfies on her wedding day, which could have been a reason for evil eye.

Coming to the sister’s question about the first year of her marriage spent in fights and arguments, what I would like to tell her is, evil eye aside, in any marriage the first year is the year of getting to know one another, and it takes lot of adjustments and compromises from both sides to build an understanding relationship. What’s important is to put it behind you and not waste your present moments brooding about what’s lost. It’s like being stuck in a cycle of lost chances and wasted time. You won’t be able to move forward in your relationship or your life if you are stuck in that cycle. You need to snap out of the time you wasted and make up for that time by creating meaningful moments with your spouse, which you would fondly look back together. Ultimately, what we choose to build is in our own hands. What we sow is what what we reap. Put the fights and arguments behind you and move on with a fresh start. Plant new seeds and build new memories with a fresh outlook on your life.

May Allah‎ﷻ grant you success in building meaningful and fond memories with your spouse.

‎أمين يا رب العلمين.

I ask Allah‎ﷻ to help us and guide us to create lives that are pleasing to Him and protect us from Evil Eyes and protect us from being the recipient of envy and jealousy and protect us from being those who carry envy and jealousy in our hearts.

‎أمين يا رب العلمين.

‎سُبحَانَ رَبِّكَ رَبِ العِزَّةِ عَمَّا يَصِفُون وَسَلَامٌ عَلى المُرسَلِين والحَمدُ الله رَبِ العلمين

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

Solace Islamic Assistance

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

Case 20: Dealing with nightmares

 

‎﷽‎‬

‎ولحَمْدُ الله رب العلمين
‎وَصَّلَاتُ وَسَّلَامُ عَلَى مُحَمَّدٍ، و عَلَى عَالِهِ و أَسحَابِهِ عَجْمَعِين، وبعد.

‎السلام عليكم ررحمة الله وبركاته

❓Question ❓

The issue we will be seeing today is of a sister who has been having nightmares which is deeply disturbing her and in spite of trying all the prescribed methods still finding it difficult to deal with it.

🅰️Answer 📝

I would like to explain a little about what happens when we sleep, and what is prescribed in our Deen regarding dreams and nightmares and finally I shall explain what the sister can do specific to her situation. ‎إن شاء الله‬

When we sleep, our soul partially departs from our body and returns back when we wake up. Hence, our sleep is a minor death and a daily preparation for our soul to taste the major death.

Dreams that disturb a person and keep him awake come from the Shaytaan. In general, there are 3 types of dreams:

It was reported from Abu Hurairah رضى الله عنه that the prophet‎ﷺ‎‬ said: “Towards the end of time, hardly any dreams that the Muslim sees will not come true. The one whose dreams are the most truthful will be the one whose speech is the most honest. The dreams of the Muslim form one of the forty-five parts of Prophecy. Dreams are of three types: the good dream which is good news from Allah; dreams which cause distress, which come from the Shaytaan; and dreams concerning matters which a person is thinking about during the day”
(Narrated by Muslim, 2263)

In case of nightmares, not only does our enemy, shaytan, trouble us while we are awake, but also in our asleep.
Two ways the shaytaan can disturb us in our sleep:
1. Scary dreams: These disturbing dreams are from shaytan, as his goal is to make us fearful and scared because he knows that our power and strength lies is in our heart. He wants to weaken our faith, or at least make us sad so that we slack in our worship to Allah.
2. By making one dream that he/she is committing a sin, or doing any act that is contrary to our deen such as appearing naked, committing adultery, drinking alcohol etc. Again, this is to weaken our faith, by making us commit sins in our dreams if not in real life.

Now whatever type the dream is, it doesn’t have the power to hurt us. Everything that happens in our life happens only with the command of Allah‎ﷻ‬. No one has the power to hurt us or shape our destiny. Shaitaan wants us to listen to his whisperings in any way possible. He even uses our dreams to weaken our eeman and push us towards deviant paths. But once we put our trust in Allah‎ﷻ‬ these dreams lose their importance. But if we keep thinking and talking about it they take control of our emotions and start to dominate our lives. We then give more control to the Shaitaan to play on our weaknesses. We feel powerless and weak in front of these plots.

Now for example when we were little we used to be afraid of the dark. It’s because of the fear of the unknown. We always assumed that somthing is waiting to attack us in the dark place. As we grew older we realized that our fear was irrational and it was our immaturity. Knowledge and our will power helped us overcome that fear. Now let’s apply the same logic to the fear of nightmares. It’s irrational because nightmares don’t have the power to hurt us. If we strengthen our resolve and put our trust in Allah we can overcome it.

The Prophet‎‎ﷺ‎‬ told us how to rid ourselves of the influence of Shaytaan during sleep. This can be achieved by always going to sleep in a state of wudhu or purity, and reciting verses from the Qur’aan and du’a’s narrated from Prophet‎ﷺ‎ ‬before going to sleep.

In one hadith it is mentioned that one should stand up and pray and in another the he should not mention it to anyone.

Now what this does is takes our mind from thinking too much about the negative effect of the dream as we turn towards Allah‎ﷻ‬ and focus on the salaah. And it is always adviced not to share the nightmare with anyone as it will reduce its importance and also stop it from actually happening.

Abu Sa’eed al-Khudri وضى الله عنه said: the prophet‎ﷺ‎‬ said: “If any one of you sees a dream that he likes, this is from Allah, so let him praise Allah for it and talk about it to others. If he sees other than that, a dream that he dislikes, this is from the Shaytaan, so let him seek refuge with Allah from its evil and not mention it to anyone, for it will not harm him.”
(Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 6584, and Muslim, 5862).

8EF47C17-CE85-4FFC-A289-73ABF1738902

Abu Salamah رضي الله عنه once said, “Sometimes I would see a dream that would be heavier on me than carrying a mountain. But since I heard this hadith I wouldn’t care about the bad dream I would see.”

Listed below are some the prescribed remedies for when one experiences nightmares, from the Sunnah:

1. It was reported that Abu Mas’ood al-Badri رضى الله عنه said: “The Messenger Allah‎ﷺ‎‬ said: ‘The last two aayahs of Soorat al-Baqarah – whoever recites them at night, they will be sufficient for him.’” (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 3786; Muslim,  807).

2. Al-Nawawi said: “Concerning the phrase, ‘The last two aayahs of Soorat al-Baqarah – whoever recites them at night, they will be sufficient for him’, it was said that it means, they will be sufficient for him instead of praying qiyaam al-layl, or as protection from Shaytaan, or as protection from vermin. It could mean all of these things. (Sahih Muslim, 6/91, 92).

3. It was reported that ‘Ayesha وضى الله عنها said: “When the Messenger of Allah‎ﷺ‎‬ went to his bed, he would blow into his hands and recite Surah Al Ikhlas and the Mi’wadhatayn (Surah’s Falaq and Naas). Then he would wipe his hands over his face and his body, as far as they could reach.” ‘Ayesha رضى الله عنها said: “When he fell ill, He would ask me to do that for him.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5416; Muslim, 2192)

4.  It was reported from Jaabir that the Messenger of Allah‎ﷺ‎‬ said: “If any one of you sees a dream that he dislikes, let him spit drily to his left three time, and seek refuge with Allaah from the Shaytaan three times, and change the side on which he was sleeping.” (narrated by Muslim, 2262).

However, the sister says she is trying most of these things and yet she is not able to overcome her fear. For this what I would like to tell her is, The Qur’an and Sunnah offer many remedies and solutions to our problems, but before that we need to develop our Taqwa and how we develop that is in understanding that only Allah‎ﷻ‬ has the power over all things and “fear” itself should be for the Creator alone. Certain emotions should be reserved only for Allah‎ﷻ‬ in excess as in Love and Fear. These emotions should be excessive only for Allah. Love Him the most and be fearful of Him the most. What should control your fear is that it would anger Allah to fear something or someone more than you fear Him‎‎ﷻ‬. How we think and how much power we give those around us to control is (be it human beings or the shaiateen) is solely in our hands and how much we are working hard towards getting closer to Allah‎ﷻ‬.

May Allah‎ﷻ‬ grant‎ us all closeness to Him and help us have the highest degree of Love and Fear for Him alone and May He grant us the understanding of
‎إيَّاكَ نَعْبُدُ وإيَّاكَ نَسْتَعِينُ‎۞‬
“You alone we worship and You alone we ask for help.”
For He alone is the source of all help and comfort.
‎أمين يا رب العلمين.

‎سُبحَانَ رَبِّكَ رَبِ العِزَّةِ عَمَّا يَصِفُون وَسَلَامٌ عَلى المُرسَلِين والحَمدُ الله رَبِ العلمين

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸
Solace Islamic Assistance
🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

Case 19: Fear of Jinn Possession

‎بِسْم الله⚜⚜
‎الحمد الله⚜
‎وصَّلات وسَّلام على رسول الله⚜
‎السلام عليكم ورحمة الله وبركاته
🌷🌷

❓Question:❓

The issue we are dealing with this week comes from the sister whose teenage daughter is scared of possession due to some game she played with her friends at school. This is quite a prevelent issue concerning our children nowadays.

🖊🖊Answer🖊🖊

Our children need to have some basic knowledge about jinn possession, and not some stuff they learn from horror movies or some fictional books.

There are some facts and some illusions connected to the issue of jinn possession, and among most people nowadays the illusions outweigh the facts. What we need to do is first provide the basic information from authentic and reliable sources to our kids.

The Qur’an and Sunnah indicate that the jinn exist, and that there is a purpose for their existence in this life, which is to worship Allah (‎ﷻ‬)Alone, with no partner or associate. Allah says:

‎وَمَا خَلَقْتُ الْجِنَّ وَالْإِنسَ إِلَّا لِيَعْبُدُونِ

“And I (Allah) created not the jinns and humans except they should worship Me (Alone).”
{Surah Adh Dhariyaat, Ayah 56}

Every individual among the sons of Adam has a jinn who has been appointed to be his constant companion (qareen). Ibn Mas’ood رضى الله عنه said: “The Messenger of Allaah (‎ﷺ‎‬) said, ‘There is not one of you who does not have a jinn appointed to be his constant companion.’ They said, ‘And you too, O Messenger of Allah‎(ﷺ‎‬)?’ He said, ‘Me too, but Allah has helped me and he has submitted, so that he only helps me to do good.’” (Reported by Muslim, 2814).

The second important thing to remember is how to protect ourselves from the harm of the jinn:
✳️ Because the jinn can see us while we cannot see them, the Prophet(‎ﷺ‎‬) taught us many ways to protect ourselves from their harm, such as seeking refuge with Allah from the accursed Shaytaan, reciting Soorat al-Falaq and Soorat al-Naas (the last two Soorahs of the Qur’aan), and reciting the words taught by Allah in the Qur’an:

‎وَقُل رَّبِّ أَعُوذُ بِكَ مِنْ هَمَزَاتِ الشَّيَاطِينِ

And say: “My Lord! I seek refuge with You from the whisperings (suggestions) of the Shayatin (devils).”

‎وَأَعُوذُ بِكَ رَبِّ أَن يَحْضُرُونِ

“And I seek refuge with You, My Lord! lest they may attend (or come near) me.”
{Surah Muminoon, Ayahs 97-98}

IMG_5268.JPG

✳️ Saying Bismillaah (in the Name of Allaah) before entering one’s home, before eating or drinking. Similarly, mentioning the name of Allah before entering the toilet or taking off one’s clothes will prevent the jinn from seeing a person’s ‘awrah or harming him, as the Prophet (‎ﷺ‎‬) said, “To put a barrier that will prevent the jinn from seeing the ‘awrah of the sons of Aadam, let any one of you say ‘Bismillaah’ when entering the toilet.”
(Reported by al-Tirmidhi, 551; Saheeh al-Jaami’, 3611).

✳️ Strength of faith and religion in general will also prevent the jinn from harming a person, so much so that if they were to fight, the one who has faith would win.

As for curing this condition the following steps are recommended:

✳️ Putting one’s trust in Allah with sincere belief that He is the only cure for everything.

✳️ Reading Qur’an and known supplications expressing seeking refuge, the most important and effective of which is sura 113 and 114, Al-Falaq and Al-Naas, which were used to cure the Prophet(‎ﷺ‎‬) himself. Surah Al-Ikhlaas, is recommended along with them, as well as the opening chapter of the Qur’an, Al-Fatihah.

 
✳️ Posession is somthing like a disease. It can be like getting a cold or having diabetes. So when Allah (‎ﷻ‬) afflicts us with a disease our sins get eliminated. So the same thing happens with possession. It is a means of our sins getting expiated or forgiven. It is a trial from Allah (‎ﷻ‬) and Prophet Mohammed (‎ﷺ‎‬) said ,
“No fatigue, nor sorrow, nor hurt, nor distress befalls a Muslim, even if it were the prick he receives from a thorn, but that Allah‎(ﷻ‬) expiates some of his sins for that.”
(recorded by Bhukhari and Muslim).

✳️ We don’t have to fear Jinn when they are also a creation of Allah (‎ﷻ‬)and if any kind of possession happens it will only happen with the command of Allah(‎ﷻ‬). And it will be better for us on the Day of Judgement and more better than other things which are harming us in a much worse way.

✳️ We need to remind our children to keep themselves and their surroundings clean as jinns and shayateen are present in dirty places. Constant remembrance of Allah (‎ﷻ‬) will also keep them away.

✳️ What we need to fear and protect ourselves from, could be the constant shamelessness we see on social media, listening to music and our inability to wear proper hijab (it is relevant to the particular case). Allah (‎ﷻ‬) will protect us and bless us with something if we do it for His sake even if we don’t like it. These things are also from Shaitaan and more harmful and dangerous to us as they create fitnah and take us away from the remembrance of Allah(‎ﷻ‬). These are the things that put us in sin, while the possession itself erases our sins and each should be treated accordingly and handled accordingly.

✳️ Not even our parents can provide us with the level of protection that only Allah(‎ﷻ‬) can, as they too are under His protection. So we need to develop Love and Tawakkal on Allah (‎ﷻ‬) as the only One who can protect us and guide us through our difficult times. Man is always in need of his Rabb. We have to seek the help of Allah and pray to Him and beseech Him to prevent the plots of the devils among mankind  and the jinn from harming us.

May Allah grant our children protection from the whispers of the shaiateen and help us be the best guardians to them as He has placed us to be….
‎أمين يا رب العلمين

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸
Solace Islamic Assistance
🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸